I dreamed my oldest quit the school where she works as a lunch lady, so my former boss T (who just retired) made me come back. I was in charge of the pizzas. The only problem was the central kitchen had no more pizzas. So for several days the ladies had been forced to call in pizza orders to a pizza place (like a combination of Big Daddy's and Papa Johns). One coworker told me I was in charge of calling in. I did, and the lady on the other line had no idea what I was asking for and promptly hung up. I tried to call back, but someone was already on the other end of the line. She said someone had called the animal hospital from our number. I said I didn't call her. She also hung up.
I tried calling the pizza place again (starting to get nervous because it's getting closer to lunch time) but couldn't call out because T and K (manager and asst mngr) kept getting on the line. I go to coworker and tell her I can't get through to the pizza place. What to do? She said, "Keep trying!"
So I go to T's office only to find out they are the ones calling the animal hospital because another coworker's dog needs to see a doctor immediately! I don't even know if that particular coworker has a dog! They won't listen to me, so I decide to take matters into my own hands and walk downstairs to the freezer. I want to see if they have any chicken so I can make chicken salad sandwiches. That'll show them.
Keep in mind there is no downstairs at the actual school kitchen, and the moment I leave the kitchen and start down the stairs I'm back at my parents' previous home (where I grew up). At the bottom of the stairs I have to turn on a light because there's a ghost and it doesn't like me very much.
In a previous dream I'd had many weeks ago the central kitchen was also out of diced chicken. In this dream I remembered that little fact and became concerned that not only would I not be able to order in pizzas, but there wouldn't be chicken for sandwiches. Sure enough, no chicken. Now what?
I walk back upstairs where now the upper level of my parents' home is not just the school kitchen, but is also combined with JC Penney. I tried to find T to let her know we're not going to get the pizzas in time when I notice a woman trying to stuff a purse down her right sleeve. I was furious! I marched right over and demanded she put it back! The woman tried to get away, but I wouldn't let her past me. We literally started a not so fun game of tag when I decided to ignore the "Don't get in the way of a customer who is stealing from us" policy and grabbed the woman's arm, lifted up her sleeve, and removed the purse.
"Were you intending to pay for this?" I asked with full sarcasm dripping disdainfully from my lips. She stammered and stuttered and I dragged her over to T to tell her what happened. As I'm explaining I see out of the corner of my eye the woman patting herself down in different areas. "Did you try to hide other things?!" "Why no, of course not," she said with a full southern twang and a guilty look. I reached over to her other arm and put my hand up her sleeve. I don't remember what I pulled out, but by that time security came and I turned her over, disgusted. I looked at T and said angrily, "I have to pee!"
We're not done yet!
I head down a hall and suddenly I'm in an office building that's also connected to LDS Hospital. I figure, "It's a hospital. There's gotta be a bathroom somewhere." But all I can find are men's rooms. That's it. Only men can go potty in this building! I find a diaperless baby on the way - who has to poop - and I am even more desperate to find the Ladies Room. The more I look the more frantic I become! Anyone who has ever held a baby with do diaper will understand!
Suddenly T steps out of an elevator and claims she has to pee as well. This isn't shocking. At work she always had to use the bathroom. "I can't find a women's restroom," I cry out in frustration. "There are only men's rooms!"
We're in a hallway right next to a men's room, and one door over is a theater auditorium. On the other side I can see another hallway and I think, "If the men's room is on this side, then the women's room HAS to be on the other side!" But the ushers at the door won't let me through because I didn't buy a ticket and don't trust I'm not going to sit and watch the show (with my diaperless baby). T says she knows a secret way around. Believe it or not, we found a women's bathroom!
I take the baby in and wait for it to poop while T uses the toilet. When she's done I hand her the baby to clean up so I can take my turn. Only the toilet has disappeared! And when I turn around to ask about it T and the baby have vanished as well. I don't know what to do. Then I remember, it's a hospital. There's a maternity ward. There HAS to be a women's bathroom there!!!
I make my way to the lower levels where I BEG the security guard to let me in so I can use the bathroom. He says okay, but apparently the bathrooms in the maternity ward are very well protected. "When you go through the door make a left, then a right, then another right..." and proceeds to tell me all the directions in the maze they created to keep out unwanted bathroom users. I go through the door, follow his directions, right down to the mysterious five holes in a wall at the end of the maze. I was told to pick the hole that said "pull". I place in my hand, grab a lever, and pull it so hard it stretches all the way out of the hole. A secret door opens up! As I run through the door a man slips through with me. We're heading to the same area. Except this is the maternity ward so no men's bathroom for him! We keep pace with one another until at last I see the placard above the door that will finally end my torture. Except it doesn't. Because it says MEN.
That's when I woke up
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