Wednesday, April 1, 2009

Happy Mama is Back, Baby!

First and foremost, I want to thank everyone who has reached out with a hand of prayer, love, and support. You have no idea what this has meant to me, especially when I wasn’t feeling myself.

I am happy to report things are much better these days. I went into the doctor and told him some of my biggest problems with the depression: intense fatigue, constantly crying, never feeling really happy. We also talked about how long it’s been going on and what might be some of the causes.

He recommended three things. The first was some medicine. He was a pharmacist before he became a doctor, so I trust him to know his medications. He opted to put me on Celexa as it would help with the fatigue as well as uplift and even out my moods.

Oh baby did it ever! I’m happier than I’ve been in about a year! Though the doctor said it might take a full two weeks before I see much of an improvement my whole family noticed a difference the very next day. I was laughing again, and it wasn’t forced. I was smiling again and it reached my eyes. Even my mom, who talked with me over the phone, said she could hear it in my voice.

I wasn’t faking happy any more!!!

There’s been one drawback to the meds. One I hope will eventually go away. Nausea, coupled with an intense gag reflex, has attacked with a vengeance. At first it was just for a few hours after taking my pill. Yesterday it was all day long. Suddenly I’m experiencing flash backs to pregnancy days. I can understand why a friend told me she lost a good bit of weight while on it…she may have been sick to her tummy for a few years, lol.

I’m still struggling a little with fatigue, but it’s not the so-tired-I-can’t-move type. I’ve only needed one nap in the last five days, and that was after a bad night with my skin. I go back into the doctor in another two weeks to see how things are going.

The second thing he recommended is counseling, in the hopes of finding some good coping techniques when I start to get too stressed or whatever. I definitely want to try, though I feel quite a bit nervous about finding the right someone to talk with. This’ll have to wait for a month or so until the kids are back on track at school. For the next few weeks I want to reintroduce my kids to Happy Mom.

The third thing he recommended was taking time out for myself, even if it’s just for a half-hour a day. I laughed a little as he named off a few things I could do: read a book, get out and take a walk, find a hobby to work on. I’ve constantly got a book in my hands, I tend to do my walking in the morning outside on good days and inside on bad days, and I’m overflowing with hobbies. I even get time all to myself come nighttime when everyone else has gone to bed.

The person I want to thank the most is my husband. It’s never easy being the one who endures the hard stuff, but just as bad is the person who stands helplessly to the side, wishing to make everything better and unable to do so. My husband, who already works harder than almost anyone I know, did everything he could to help me out. He washed dishes, helped the kids with homework, cooked dinner, helped clean the house, allowed me to sleep when it was needed, and simply became SuperDad during the last several weeks. I am so glad I was able to pull out of this so he could focus more on work (which is crazy busy this next week) without worrying about what was happening at home.

If ever there was a woman who was truly blessed by family and friends, it’s me. Happy Mom.


Emily said...

I am so glad that you are doing better and on the mend! I can tell a difference in your writing already! You are truly blessed! Have a beautiful day today!

Michael said...

I'm glad you're feeling better Laurie.

Team Jensen said...

Laurie! I'm so happy to hear you're feeling so significantly better!