At My Funeral

I attended the funeral of a church member yesterday. I love attending funerals for one simple reason - you get to know the person more than you ever could have in real life.

When speaking of ourselves we tend to gravitate automatically towards the negative. We can't help looking back on our lives and seeing all the things we managed not to accomplish, the things where we went so wrong. As our own worst critics we cannot help seeing where we should have stepped up, could have done more, and might have made a difference.

The funny thing is we impact others more than we know. While we may want to criticize ourselves, there are so many others who are ready and willing to praise the person we were to them. Did that make sense? Perhaps a better way of putting it is, our perceptions of ourselves is far different than the perceptions of others.

After yesterday's funeral I couldn't help thinking about what people might say about me if I were to die tomorrow. At only 34 I haven't exactly lived a long life. Is there truly anything about me and the way I've lived my life that might be worthy of notice? If you were to ask me, not really. I'm nothing too special when compared to so many others I know. It's difficult for me to believe anyone outside of immediate family who might even attend.

Oh I know I'm loved. This really isn't a pity-party, nor a cry for others to tell me how awesome I am. It's just me pondering my life, and wondering if I've really lived in such a way to be satisfied with where I might leave it. Sister L left an extraordinary legacy here on earth. The things said of her touched more than just one heart. The amount of family alone who came to celebrate Sister L was a testament to the amazing woman she was. The words spoken of how she loved, served, and lived could not have born better witness to her love for the gospel of Christ.

And so I got to thinking about what others might say about me. Have I lived in such a way that those who know me know of my intense love for them, for the gospel, for my family? Has my testimony been obvious to those I have ever spoken with? Does my Heavenly Father look down upon me feeling pleased with what I've accomplished thus far?

The natural course of my thoughts took me one step further, and I began to think about the things I'd like people to say. This is when I came to the conclusion, if I want people to say certain things about me, it's time to start living my life in a way to make those things true. Perhaps this was a "wake-up" call of sorts to begin a few changes.

In any case, I'd invite you to take a few minutes to think about what you'd like to have said about you, and then make it possible!